Loyd Rawls

Harzards of Dumping Business Stress on Unexpecting Loved Ones
November 12, 2007

No doubt, what happens at work can just fry a family member’s emotions. Due to the unavoidable positioning of family within your business, there are some challenging, emotionally brutal, embarrassing, and profoundly nonsensical situations that simply must be endured. As frustration with parents, siblings, in-laws or cousins grows to a point that blood pressure is beginning to blow out eye brows, it is indeed time to find a way to offload emotions and relieve the stress. 

If you are facing the dilemma of “say nothing or explode,” you must find a place or way to relieve this emotional overload. However, it is your responsibility to make sure your dump site can handle this hazardous waste. Your natural reaction may be to go home and share this unfortunate, and maybe unfair, circumstance with your beloved wife or call your wonderful mother who has always been there to listen to you when you just need to get things off your chest. 

But hold on! Before you pull the dump lever, step back and take heed to what you are doing. Ask yourself:

• What is the relationship between the person on whom I am relieving my stress and the person who you have concluded has caused my stress?
• What has generally been the evolution of these arguments, deadlocks or unfortunate circumstances?
• Is this just a normal and customary manifestation of business or am I really in deep kemshi?

If your dump site (spouse, Mom or sibling) lacks objectivity, don’t do it!

It should not be a news flash that there is a 95% chance that family members lack objectivity! You could be throwing gas on a flame by aggravating your wife’s natural rivalry with your brother, sister or in-law. Potentially even worse, you may be creating a bias that everyone will regret later when you cannot get everyone to be in the same house for Thanksgiving dinner. 

Undermining family harmony ultimately undermines family business productivity. Those of us who work in the family business have a stewardship responsibility to understand the implications of our hazardous emotional waste site on family harmony. As an actively employed family member, you must understand that some family members, due to their emotional predisposition, are unfortunately not equipped to handle what you may need to off load. Otherwise, you may be undermining not only your family’s ability to come together for Thanksgiving dinner, social events and vacations; you may also be handicapping your business.  

Family harmony and unity cannot be neutral. Harmony is either a family business asset or a liability.

Next I will discuss how you can protect family harmony.

Posted by Loyd Rawls on November 12, 2007 | Comments (0)